March 4, 2016 - Horrible in burlap

It’s March! Well, of course it is, Sally. But March is very special, because it means I made it through February and making it through February means I made it through my next pulmonary appointment. Two, in fact. I did so good at the first one, it won me a second one. And still I know….very little. Or maybe I know a lot but have no idea what it means.

We threw on the ole “climbing shoes” and took to the stairs! Well, we did this after donning on a spiffy super thick and super wide velvety red head band (I know you are jealous), an electrode glued to my forehead under the head band all of which was connect by two cables to a monitor which Lung Guru carried while walking beside me. We were a hoot to say the least. Down the halls we went, up the halls we went, down the stairs, up the stairs, down the halls, up the halls, down the stairs, up the stairs, over and over while recording my oxygen saturations. I was a sweaty mess with hair puffed up on the top of my head when all was said and done. Either my head was too big for the headband, or my hair too silky (let’s go with that one) because about 3 or 4 times the velvety thick  headband about shot off the top of my head, each time taking my hair higher and higher. At one point during our walk (in the hallways where I work!), one little girl of about six years at best walked by and looked at me as if she had seen a lady with 3 heads.  Then she smiled and giggled when I finally gave her a goofy look. I couldn’t resist. I knew I looked like a hot mess, and I knew she was trying to figure out why I had cables coming out of my head. After the little girl, I only ran into 4 coworkers, who don’t even work in that building, while sporting this fabulous straight off of a Richard Simmons video look. Now how does that always happen to me?! I packed up my embarrassment and threw it into my stride hurrying as quickly as I could to get back to the clinic office.

We don’t know if I passed or failed. We decided that I passed in that my oxygen didn’t drop as low as last time (89%), but failed in that I still dropped to 94%. Quite honestly, we have no idea what to make of it. 94 is better than 89. And now it’s just a number without a cause. My CT just doesn’t look significant enough to give me these symptoms. And 94% isn’t really all that worrisome given that it wasn’t 89%. There is fibrosis, but it is not impressive fibrosis. My heart works perfect.  Also not a reason to give me these problems. So we decided to chalk it up to maybe asthma…until appointment number two, where I had a 60 minute asthma challenge….and passed with flying colors. What???? I could not have been more surprised. I would have bet the bank that not only did I have asthma, but I had worsening asthma compared to a year ago. Good thing I didn’t bet the bank. Good thing because I would look horrible in burlap.

So this is where we will most likely land ….my chest has been radiated far too much. My chest has been operated on far too much. My chest wall has simply decided to be less expandable than it once has been. Less expandable = less lung volume = what we are seeing on the pulmonary function tests = periodic lung symptoms = I am simply just not going to worry about it anymore. All I really needed to know was do I have fibrosis? Yes. Is it the progressive kind? No.  Do I have asthma as I have always been told. Doesn’t appear so. (Though I still have asthma symptoms in exercise, cold weather, and a respiratory illness). Are my lungs just tired? Yes. Does it matter? Who knows? I simply think I am going to be done with this lung workup and if my symptoms progress, start back over then.  I say all of this having not yet spoken to Lung Guru after my asthma test (the respiratory therapist gave me the news), nor do I have the official read on that test, but I feel sure this is where she will land too. She said we would chat this week once she had a chance to look at the most recent test. I’m thinking Lung Guru has to think I am off my rocker. Maybe the little girl in the hallways pegged me right all along. I’m a lady with three heads. I’m an enigma. But I’m still lovable right?

It’s a good appointment. It’s puzzling. But it’s good. You are up to date.




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